As many of you may know, Ayesha Curry sat down alongside her mother & sister in law and participate in Jada Pinkett Smith’s Red Table Talk Show.
Now understand this: I haven’t viewed this particular episode, watched any clips, or read any articles
However, my social media feed (specifically Facebook) quickly filled in the gaps. Now with that being said: it is my “understanding” that Ayesha made statements alluring to the fact that she sometimes wouldn’t mind attention from other men and she’s even asked herself “what’s wrong with me?” when she doesn’t get unsolicited compliments, cat calling, random slip n slide DM action.
Of course social media and it’s toxic tendencies did what it does best and they took a very innocent, transparent moment and made it ugly and proceeded to drag her through the mud, rinsed her clean and drug her again.
Now I expected men to have their fair share of reactions like the above meme (probably created by a man) but to see women dogging other women for siding women struck a nerve with me. I find it extremely hard to believe in the age of IG models and Snapchat filters that there is a women out here that has NEVER felt less than pretty. Especially a woman who has birthed one child or more. Heaven forbid that she has multiples and has to birth her kids at the same time.
Being a woman is a hard job. Being famous is even harder. But being black, famous & a woman has to be the ultimate trifecta of hardships. Could you imagine being with the love of your life practically all your life, being with him before the money, kids & fame then that changing and him becoming a household name and everything you say & do is under a microscope and picked apart til there’s nothing left? Add that to being a wife, mother & entrepreneur….MY GOD!!! 😩
Ayesha has felt exactly what every woman has felt on more than one occasion in her life. Our bodies change so much and in so many different ways. We deal with the hormonal, physical & emotional changes MONTHLY with our cycles. We change over a 9 month period when pregnant and not all can afford fancy trainers and meal preps to bounce back so fast or at all for that matter so you add postpartum depression to the mix. And let’s not forget the emotional rollercoaster that is dating and/or marriage. As a single woman that alone keeps me needing Jesus, a councilor and some water turned into wine.
Ayesha used this larger than life platform and showed how despite all the fame & fortune she is still very human & vulnerable. You can have a mate that supplies all your wants, needs & desires and still struggle with feeling than. It’s VERY possible. I was happier than ever in a relationship some years ago and it still felt good to know that men found me attractive. Of course we love knowing that our mate is still attracted to us after serval months or years or being with us but we kinda assume that and don’t expect any different after awhile so when a stranger shows interest it lets ya know I may be off the market but I’ve still got it and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that. If we’re all perfectly honest men have the same thoughts too. We’re human and we like the feeling of being desired…Simple as that. We all open up our social media apps and posts pics, videos, statuses and memes with hopes that someone will find us funny and/or attractive. Social media was literally created to bring this out of people. To connect to friends and strangers and let the cards fall where they may. There are even dating site specifically for finding someone and see who’s attracted to you. Instagram is talking about doing away with the “likes” because the craving to feel important & desired is in some cases dangerous to ones well being. People have been bullied and tragic stories have been birthed out of this societal desire for love & attention online so how/why is it all of a sudden so foreign when Ayesha Curry opens up about wanting to feel desired by others?
That Red Table Talk session should’ve been the foundation for women being comfortable so take a moment and not pretend to have it all together and be the strong friend and say, “I too have felt how Ayesha has felt” and share their experiences in a healthy manner and help other women to be comfortable being transparent. Men should’ve taken this as a teachable moment that behind the gifts, trips, makeup, smiles, good sex & date nights that their woman can still struggle with feeling good enough and pretty and take time today to do a little extra to show how much he loves and appreciates her.
This conversation could’ve been something so beautiful on the path to emotional wholeness between men & women. Yet here we are all of a week into mental health awareness month having online wars against each other over someone being emotionally strong enough to share her weaknesses with the world.