So today while listening to the Woman Evolve podcast, Sarah Jakes was speaking about a recent interview that Mary J Blige did where she opened up about her 2018 divorce and all the trauma in her life as early as her childhood. In that interview she spoke on how she’s now “mothering herself” and baaaaaybeh LISTEN! that term hit me like a ton of bricks. I’ve been doing that all 2019 and didn’t even know there was a special name to it.
What would happen if we as women looked at self care from the point of view of a mother to a child? How much more intentional and protective would we be about self? A GOOD mother will do anything to protect her child. She will do anything to provide for her child. She will do anything to ensure that her child has a better chance at a good life. She will work multiple jobs. She will stay up late nights when that child is sick. She will go without just so that child can have the necessities and even the pleasantries of life.
All 2019 I’ve intentionally and unintentionally done all I know to do to protect my peace, become emotionally and spiritually whole. Recently I’ve added becoming financially free to the “self care” list for me and I must say this has been the most rewarding year of my adult life. I have my moments (like now) where I’m tired and I don’t want to do anything but turn my phone off and sleep for a few days, but then I begin to plan out my paychecks and what all I can check off my list to pay off towards my financial goals and it fuels me to pick up more photo booth event work and decline time with friends and family so that I’m not tempted to spend money that I’ll regret after the fun is over.
I want to challenge anyone reading this to start viewing your self care as #MotheringYourself and see how much more intentional you become. I know for me personally, I don’t have kids but I love kids so much and I pray that it’s in God’s will that I one day get married and have a child of my own. How much more “okay” would you be about not having a kid if you decided to make yourself the kid you desire? It’s not saying that you’re giving up on that dream or that God isn’t capable of answering that prayer, but might I suggest that taking on life from that perspective might prepare you for your future child. I mean realistically, are we really ready for the responsibility of another human if we are struggling to take care of self in a healthy manner? I know I jokingly say all the time how I need this kid thing to happen because I’m always tired just doing for me and I’m getting too old to be running behind a kid too LOL but seriously, could that be WHY I haven’t been introduced to my husband because I haven’t mastered a healthy work life balance? #ThingsThatMakeYouGoHmm